When faced with problems it is important to keep everything in perspective in order to keep yourself as stress free as possible in today’s fast paced world. One of the best skills a woman can possess is the ability to “not sweat the small stuff”.

For some this is harder than for others. It mostly depends on your personality and your ability to train your mind to take a step back and look at the big picture. When a perceived crisis occurs take a money and ask yourself. “Will this matter in 10 minutes? 10 days? 10 years?”

Usually by the time you go through that thought process, the problem no longer seems as drastic as it once did. By using this method you can prioritize just how urgent the situation really is in the scope of life. If you answer yes to the first but no to the last two, then chances are this is not that urgent of an issue. Yes to the first two but no to the last, yes, you likely have to give this crisis a bit more of your attention. If you answer yes to all three, then it is time to take action now.

By compartmentalizing all of your worries you can alleviate many of the stressors in your life. Give the real issues your attention and let the smaller issues sort themselves out, as they so often do. Worrying about the little stuff consumes so much of our time that often the big issues, the ones we should be focused on, go left unattended. You might even find that dealing with the big issues first removes all of the smaller ones as a by-product.

If you are a worrier by nature, those three questions will help you get a grasp on the situation and not allow you to make a mountain out of a molehill. You will feel more in control of every situation and you will worry less.

Technorati Tags: self improvement, stop worrying, stress management

Origins and Reasons For Mother’s DayI came across this article by Christine Appell about Mother’s Day and it’s origins and I thought I must pass it along. Sometimes we become so lost in the happenings of today and the planning of our future that we forget about the past and the people who got us where we are today.

So, Mother’s Day was not just invented by marketers to get people to buy things and help the economy. It evolved from a true purpose of honoring women. It goes all the way back to Greek and Roman days when they celebrated and honored goddesses on certain days of the year. And other countries and populations always found ways to celebrate mothers. Julia Ward Howe, the woman who wrote the Battle Hymn of the Republic suggested it in 1872. Julia was an activist, writer, and poet. Her idea was a Mother’s Day celebration of Peace in June. She wanted women to work together against the war in a famous “Mother’s Day Proclamation” written in Boston in 1870. She held a celebration in June of Mothers for years, but it was later replaced by the Mother’s Day as we now know it. She focused on a Mother’s Peace Day, which I think would be a great idea to continue. That and a Mother Earth Day – different than our Earth Day as we now celebrate it.

Anna Jarvis is probably seen as the mother of Mother’s Day as we now celebrate it. She got the idea from her own mother, Mrs. Anna Marie Reeves. Mrs. Reeves was an activist and a social worker who believed that all mothers, living and dead, should be honored, along with their contributions to society. Mrs. Reeves died in 1905 and her daughter, a single woman with no children, went on to promote this dream of her mother’s. Through letter writing and lobbying and other supporters, Mother’s Day was celebrated in almost every state by 1911 and on May 6, 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed a joint resolution declaring the 2nd Sunday of May as Mother’s Day.

We owe a lot to our Mothers. Even in the article, they commented that there appeared to be a lack of respect for Mothers and women.

But women provide a balance to the world and I can understand why Julia Ward Howe wanted the idea of a Mother’s Peace Day. Women tend to have the more nurturing side, involving getting along, cooperation, being nice – all those things our mothers taught us about getting along with our friends. How to get along with people tends to be huge when we are young. It is one thing we teach in schools, preschools, churches, and at work. It starts with Mom at home. How do you do with your siblings or your early playmates? How do you learn to give and take? What about conflict management? He took your toy – now what can you do? There are many answers to that question, and sometimes the solution came from “Mom”. What else do we get from Moms? Hopefully a lot of wonderful things. I know there are many women who are not really up to the job – I work as a counselor so I see a lot. So how about looking back and finding the good things – perhaps she did the best she could. When were the times she thought of you first? When did you have a special time together at the park or zoo? Was she there for you in “wonderful” adolescence?

In honoring our mothers, we are also getting to look at ourselves and our role as a son or daughter. Are we doing all we can to value people in our family and our friends? You know, sometimes a “Mom” is someone who always acted as Mom in our lives and to whom we are very close – someone who made us feel nurtured and warm and fuzzy. Someone who made us feel “special.” That is a Mom! They come in all shapes, styles, sizes, and with all kinds of attitudes. And if you are a Mom, be the kind of Mom you would have liked!

I would like to take this opportunity to wish all of the women a Happy Mother’s Day.

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Chris is a therapist specializing in children and families. She is a trainer, clinician,advocate, and consultant. Please check out http://bestgiftsformom.blogspot.com and you can also go to http://www.bestgifts2day.com for some easy shopping.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christine_Appell
http://EzineArticles.com/?Origins-and-Reasons-For-Mothers-Day&id=4160607

Technorati Tags: how mothers day started, mother's day, women activists, womens issues

With spring in the air it is easy to feel more positive about the world in general. It is amazing what a bit of sunshine and warmth can do for your outlook. Many people do some form of spring cleaning around their home at this time of year. It is pleasant to be able to throw open the windows and let the fresh air into our homes.

With this kind of positive outlook, perhaps it is also a good time to do some spring cleaning in other areas of our lives as well. Getting rid of old habits, old hurts and old troubles can have the same kind of renewing effect on our lives as cleaning out your home has on your environment. Everything will feel fresh and your mind will be more focused and you will have much more clarity in your goals and expectations of life.

Getting rid of old habits:

We all have things we would like to improve about ourselves. Whether it is health related, such as quitting smoking or losing weight; or it might be a different kind of habit, such as allowing people to take advantage of your good nature. Whatever your habit, set a plan to make a change. With bolstered spirits at this time of year, you have a greater chance of success.

Getting rid of old hurts:

This time of year is a good time to address old issues with the people in your life. Pick one relationship in your life and make a plan to make it better. Even if the hurt does not go away, you can make a plan for forgiveness. Understand that the other person may not be at the same place mentally or emotionally as you are. If that is the case, then all you need do is to tell that person, “I forgive you”, and move on. It is amazing how uplifting those words can be if you say it with conviction and truly mean that you are leaving those hurts in the past.

Getting rid of old troubles:

Whether it is money troubles, work troubles or relationship troubles, it is time to take action and create change. Troubles do not just disappear on their own. If you have a problem that just won’t go away, now is the perfect time to put a plan into effect that will remove that trouble from your life. Just taking action can make all the difference in your life.

So as you are doing your spring cleaning around your home, start thinking about other areas that need cleaning up so you can have the summer of your life! Start each day with a prayer of thanks. Spring is the renewal of life and you should use this opportunity to renew your faith in God and in life.

Technorati Tags: getting rid of the bad in your life, renewing your faith, self improvement

Today, more than at any other time, with the uncertainty of job security it is important to have a “Plan B”. Even without the economic termoil, you may find some comfort in developing a secondary stream of income. But what can you do?

Almost everyone has hidden talents that are obvious to those around us but we do not recognize them ourselves. The easiest way to decide what your talents are is to look at your friends and ask yourself “What do my friends and family ask my advice about, or ask for my help with, most often?”

The people who know us best already know the hidden treasures within you. If you can’t figure this out yourself, ask for their advice on what they think you would be best at. Do they always come to you when they need some baked goodies for a party? Are you the one they come to to plan a family event? Are you the yard sale and thrift store queen? Do you love to shop and know the stores so well in your neighborhood that you can find virtually anything you need in one outing?

You may not see these as hidden talents or having a potential for income, but those very traits are necessary if you are considering a catering service, an event planning business, an ebay business or a personal shopper business. Not only can you make money from providing these services to others, you can have fun doing it! Obviously you already really enjoy these activities which is why you have gotten so good at it. Why not turn it into a part-time or full-time business?

Creating a secondary stream of income will take the stress of these economic times away as you will always have that Plan B in place.

Technorati Tags: multiple streams of income, secondary income, starting a business

Have you ever noticed that the eariliest events of your day generally set the tone for the entire day? If you over-sleep and start your day feeling like you are behind schedule, the whole day feels like you are hurried and running one step behind. If you wake up to a disaster, you are almost guaranteed to have a day that feels like you might as well have just stayed in bed.

There are ways, though, to ensure you have a great day every day. Planning your early morning events and scheduling in an act of kindness to start off your day can set your mood to a good one every single day. You would be surprised at how energizing this is and it is so easy to do.

This is how to plan to have a good day:

1. Just before going to bed at night think of an act of kindness you can complete in 5 minutes the next morning. It might just be sending an email to your SisterFriend with a word of encouragement or love, sending someone flowers just for the fun of it or bringing a co-worker a slice of your home-baked cake.
2. Write down this random act of kindness you have planned for the next morning and place it on your bedside table or tape it to your bathroom mirror so it is the first thing you will see in the morning.
3. Set your alarm 5 minutes earlier than you normally do.
4. Get up the next morning and do that special something.

You will be amazed at how this will change your day, every day. You will go to sleep with positive thoughts in your mind and sleep better. You will wake each day feeling more rested. The warmth from within that you get from doing something nice for another human being cannot be dupicated by any other means. You will start your day with a smile on your face and look toward the day with a feeling of anticipation.

Let’s not overlook the effect your acts of kindness will have on the recipiants. You will help someone else start their day with a smile as well. I strongly believe you must give love to receive love. By planning to do something nice for others every day, you will find it comes back to you tenfold.

Technorati Tags: planning your day, positive thinking, random acts of kindness, self improvement

Are you a chronic worrier?

If much of your time is spent worrying about possible outcomes of situations, you are draining your energy that could be better spent on productivity. There are times when you should worry. But not doing anything about what is worrying you is counter-productive.

One thing you must realize is that the majority of people who are chronic worriers have a feeling of being out of control in certain situations. Learning to take back the control whenever possible, or developing plans of action can make you feel more in control and alleviate your need to worry.

If you are a naturally fearful person, this may be a difficult habit to change. That does not mean it is not impossible. Here are some tips for dealing with your concerns to get them out of the way so they do not take over your daily life.

1. Analyze what is causing your worries. Most of the things you fret about every day are problems. So take a look at the problem and come up with some concrete solutions. Set aside an hour per day to worry your way through the problem. Non-productive worrying is just that….non-productive.
So write down the problem to put a name to it. Then write a list of actions you can take to eliminate it. If you cannot come up with any solutions, then it most likely is something out of your control and therefore not something you should focus your attention on. Instead, focus on a plan to counteract the problem.

2. Do not fall into the habit of worrying about “What if…” Deal with a situation when it happens instead of worrying about an event that may not happen. The What if’s in life can needlessly sap your energy. If you are a speculative worrier, then set a time aside to deal with the What if’s and create a plan of action to deal with your most concerning fears. Having a plan of action already in place will take the fear out of the What if’s.

Setting a specific time every day to worry will allow you to indulge in your habit but it will also give you the freedom of having time to spend not worrying. That worry free time will be far more creative and productive without that cloud of fear continually hanging over your head. You will feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders and will regain control over your life.

Technorati Tags: chronic worrier, relieving stress, Take The Lid Off: Reducing the Pressure of Stress

“If your needs are many you may never find success; but if your needs are few you may always find happiness.”

I recently heard this statement from a successful entrepreneur and it made me think how true it really is. For most people, success and happiness are one and the same. But not everyone has the same definition of success.

For some, success is measured by material and financial worth. Greed is often the center of their lives. The greedier you become, the less chance you have of success. If you are never satisfied with what you have or what you have accomplished, happiness becomes unattainable.

For others, success is measured by self-worth. They are content with having their daily needs met on the most basic levels; a roof over their heads, food on the table and bills paid on time. For those whose needs are few, happiness can be found on any given day. They strive to help others to grow their self-worth. They are successful every day of their lives.

Do not be mistaken, there is nothing wrong with prosperity. We all strive to be more prosperous. But do not confuse prosperity with success in life. A person of the most meager means can be a success at life.

Proverbs 22:9
He that hath a bountiful eye shall be blessed; for he giveth of his bread to the poor.

How do you define success?

Technorati Tags: finding happiness, life coaching, living a fulfilling life, success

When we were children, we were taught the importance of sharing, yet as we grow up, the concept of sharing seems to get lost somewhere along the way. As we venture out into the world as an adult, acquiring material things and “gathering” takes over our lives and sharing often becomes a thing of the past.

In these economic times, it is difficult to watch friends and families lose their homes, their jobs and their  way of life. Now, more than ever, is a time for sharing. The bond you form with others through sharing is far more valuable than any material goods you may own. Even if all you have to share is a kind word, a smile or your time to help another human being in need, it is worth giving. Caring for our neighbors is what we were put on this earth to do.

Look at the challenges of today as a blessing. It is time to reconnect with the world instead of being self-centered and focused on personal gain. Focus instead on personal and spiritual growth. Every time you share you expand your reach and touch another individual and you become a better person for it.

No matter how bad your own situation is, you can always lend a hand. You should look at the recession as a wake up call and an opportunity to become a more caring person. It is time to realize that material worth is a fleeting thing. Status symbols do not define you. The level of kindness and caring you give are the true measures of who you really are.

I don’t know about you, but I would much rather leave this world being known as the woman with the big heart than the woman with the nice house or the luxurious car. Leave your mark on the world by touching as many people as you can with kindness and you will be rewarded in a big way.

Technorati Tags: acts of kindness, helping others, sharing, spirituality

Today as I was surfing the net trying to find inspiration on what to write, I came across this article and I knew that it was one that I wish I had written. So instead of  trying to come up with something that would inspire you on my own, I am choosing to share instead. I hope you will find this article as motivational as I did.

Are You Living Life Or Just Existing?
Some people look back on what they call the “good old days” as if all the joy and success of those days will never happen for them again.  In other words, life then was great, but life today is not, and never will be like the “good old days.”

In my past, I have some really fond memories of some really good times.  I also have some memories of some very difficult and challenging times.  But regardless of good, bad or mediocre, the past is still the past.

Meanwhile, as life goes on, I look forward to some great days ahead.  I anticipate and expect for things in my life to continue to get better, not worse.  But those days are still future.  I cannot live in the future, nor can I go back and live in the past.

I am left with only this moment to live; I can only live right now, today, in the present.  In fact, I can only live one minute at a time.  I am living in the now.

The present moment that you are living in right now was yesterday’s future.  This very moment will soon become your past.  The question is, when this moment becomes your past, will it be something good, bad, or mediocre?

Far too many people try to just survive the moment that they are living in.  Many are struggling to just get through another day.  Countless people wake up with a lack of enthusiasm to face the new day ahead of them.

When was the last time you talked to someone really excited about “today?”  How about you?  Can you recall the last time you were bubbling over with anticipation of a new day?  Waking up with excitement and anticipation is, for the most part, reserved for the day someone leaves for a fun filled vacation, certainly not just an average ordinary day.

Instead, people choose to remember the “good old days.”  They reflect on how much better life was back then; how much more fun they had in their lives back then; how much easier and simpler life was, back then.  Going through life with that kind of an attitude, those “good old days” become more and more distant as each new uneventful day passes.  Hopes and promises of the future become dimmer as days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months.

But, if you want to, you can choose to embrace life!  You can choose to live your life the best that you know how right now, today.  You can make the choice each morning that you are going enjoy the life that you have been given today.

Begin today building brand new “good old days” by carrying an attitude of expectation.  Greet each new day with anticipation.  Keep your eyes open during the new day for ways that you can help and contribute to someone else’s life.

Today is the only day that you can live, and it’s your choice how you live it.  You choose whether to be in a good mood or a lousy mood.  You choose whether to be productive or to be lazy.  You choose whether to lend a hand to someone in some way or not.

Endeavoring to live each new day with anticipation and expectation is truly living life and not just existing and surviving.  And while there will always be challenges and obstacles that everyone must face from time to time, we can also choose to meet those as well with expectations of finding solutions.

You can choose to start each new day however you want to.  You can choose to survive and just try to get by.  You can go through your new day expecting more of the same.

But, on the other hand, you can start each new day by thanking God for the life that He has given you.  You can ask Him for help and direction.  You can then live each new day looking for and expecting His blessings.

With that kind of an attitude, you will be truly living.  You will not only see a positive change in your own life, but you will be much more inclined to love others and thus you will make a difference in their lives as well.  And, you will be building brand new, “good old days.”

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Michael A. Verdicchio offers a FREE LIFETIME MEMBERSHIP to, “Enriching Your Life Now!” as well as a FREE NEWSLETTER at http://www.ConfidenceAndJoy.com He also offers a FREE series of articles on success at http://www.ReducingStressAtWork.com
Michael is a husband, father, minister, author, and broadcaster. He has also been the voice on numerous projects and productions including Mike’s Pep Talks!

I hope you have enjoyed reading this article and understand that every day we have choices to make. It doesn’t matter what your circumstances are, no matter where you live, what your income is, what color your skin is; today you can wake up and make the decision to create a memorable day. These ARE the good old days.

Technorati Tags: living for today, motivation

We all have habits we would like to change to help us be healthier, happier individuals. Having a SisterFriend to help you make changes in your life is an added benefit to your already close bond.

A habit is just a routine that has become a part of who we currently are. If we want to change or improve ourselves, we need to change those habits. Whether you are trying to quit smoking, lose weight, create better work ethics or improve your self confidence, a SisterFriend can help keep you on track of your goals. Here are some tips that can help.

Thirteen Tips

1) Practice one mental or behavioral change for 30-days to make it a new habit.

2) Create and use a new trigger (or new ritual) to precede the new habit.

3) Find a healthy replacement for what the old behavior provided.

4) Change only one habit at a time.

5) Design the new thought or behavior to be as agreeable as possible.

6) Nuke negative self-talk by inserting the negation: “but” (e.g., “Blah, blah, blah; BUT, doing ‘A’ will bring me more ‘B’.)

7) After you decide to change a thought or behavior, add commitment and clarity by writing it down a few times.

Set 30, 90, and 365 day benchmarks. At 30 days, it is a conditioned new habit. At 90 days, it is resistant to unexpected setbacks and runs    automatically. At 365 days, your life runs more smoothly by itself with the new habit than without it.

9) Go public for exposure. Give $100 to your SisterFriend. Let her keep it if you quit the habit during the first 30 days. However, give yourself a  reward for maintaining the practice.

10) Keep the new habit simple and doable. Work on one habit at a time [see #4 above].

11) Repeat the new habit consistently and every day for 30 days [see #1 above].

12) When selecting the new habit, first try several adaptations in the range of possibilities to find the one that works best for you.

13) Tell your SisterFriend what you are doing and keep them updated. Seek her encouragement and support.

 By soliciting the help of your friend, you increase your chances of success. Perhaps you both can work on a self-improvement change of behavior at the same time.

Technorati Tags: breaking habits, breaking unhealthy habits, support for life changes